Keys to a successful marriage

The Telegraph's Sunday Leisure section featured a story about what research tells us about marriage. In short, the story examined what makes marriages successful and what makes them fail, based on statistics.

I found the results interesting, and thought I'd share them.

• Take life's big steps in mindful order. Research has shown that odds of a marriage staying together improve "when you graduate from college first; then marry, then have children."

This makes sense to me. Get your life together, enjoy the time you have with a significant other and then try to raise new little people. By the time you get to the kids part, you should already have the support (financially, emotionally, physically, mentally) you need from your spouse.

• Be wary of casual cohabitation. Some researchers say that there is "a tendency for cohabitating couples who otherwise wouldn't marry to slide into marriages of convenience that later hit the rocks."

I can see this happening. I have a friend who has lived with her boyfriend for about five years, and in the past she has said that the relationship was one of convenience. However, I think if you make a conscience decision to not let this happen, it would be OK.

• Find a supportive workplace. Since work-day emotions can spill over at home, "it makes sense to avoid workplaces where the deck is stacked against you."

Hmmm. Wouldn't it also be possible that you can find relief with your spouse when you try to escape your work? I think this one could go either way.

• Act quickly when troubles arise. Women who work outside the home are more likely to think it's a viable option to leave. However, dual-income households tend to share chores more evenly and make happier marriages. "Whatever the case, if your marriage starts to slide, act right away to change damaging behavior or take counseling or a marriage education program."

I'd rather have my own income than be financially dependent on my husband, but does that make me more likely to leave in general or just more likely to leave a bad situation? And if it's leaving a bad situation, is that really so bad? In any case, I definitely agree to work out troubles first before throwing a marriage away.

What do you think of these supposed keys to a successful marriage? Would you/do you make decisions based on research and statistics, or are you more likely to throw caution to the wind? What do you think are the building blocks of a successful marriage?