Waiting for him to come around

Back in college, there was this guy that I really wanted to go out with. We were friends, and for various reasons he said he was interested in me but wasn't ready for a relationship. Stupidly, I said I would wait for him. And as you probably have guessed by now, he never came around.

I see now that his telling me that he wasn't "ready" for a relationship really meant that he just wasn't that into me. (Thanks, Greg and Liz.) I'm pretty sure my friends knew this but were too nice to tell me. But at the time, I couldn't see that, and I held out hope that when he was "ready" we would be together.

So I waited. And waited. And waited. And, whoops! He got a girlfriend all right, but it just wasn't me.

Pain and heartache followed, and it all could have been avoided (or at least dealt with months earlier) if I had just decided to move on and not wait around for someone who wasn't going to be there later. Ruined the friendship, too. That was a bummer.

Has anyone else told anyone they would wait for them? How did that turn out? Has someone told you they would wait for you? What did you think about that? Is waiting for someone ever a good idea? I'm inclined to say no, but I could be wrong.

Tattoos

When it comes to romantic relationships, I'm all for expressing your love for your significant other.

However, when it comes to tattoos, I just cannot advocate the effort.

Mind you, I do have a tattoo and I remember everything about the day, from where I went to who went with me to what I ate before I got it.

So when I hear of people going to the tattoo shop together to get matching tattoos, especially those who have only been in a relationship for a short time, I cringe a little. That's because I know that if the relationship ends, the tattoo will be a constant reminder of a failed relationship.

Worse yet are those who get the person's image or names inked on them. You will never be able to forget the person if the relationship ends. And just imagine explaining it to future significant others. I'm certain it is a bit of a turn-off.

My thing is, for the most part, tattoos are permanent. Relationships rarely are.

What do you think of getting tattoos with your partner or with your partner's names on it? Have you ever done it? Do you regret it? Do you think it matters whether or not you are married to the person?

Is the economy hurting your love life?

It is sad when the economy is hurting the dating scene, and I truly think it is. Raven already mentioned how long-distance couples are seeing each other less because of gas prices, and now we're looking for cheaper dates too.

My boyfriend and I are definitely feeling the pinch on our wallets when it comes to going out. Trips to Atlanta are more infrequent and carefully considered and planned. We used to have lunch together at a restaurant once a week on a regular basis, and that's all but stopped completely. Even simple things, like going out and shooting some pool, have been scaled back. With rising gas prices and rising — well — everything else, we just can't afford to do these things at the same frequency anymore.

As a result, we look for cheap things to do with our time. This usually includes renting movies, cooking dinner for each other and going to the pool. Still fun, but definitely more thrifty.

Has the economy affected how you plan your dates? Have you changed plans in order to save money? What are some ways you save money when dating?

Do you think this affects you more if you are single? Obviously, those who are in a relationship already have a date, they just need something cheap to do. Singles often spend money to get a date (in a non-prostitute sort of way, get your head out of the gutter), such as going out to a bar and buying drinks or generally being social and out in public.

"I do" at a later date

This year, I’m scheduled to be in one wedding and attend two more.

The bright side of all of these weddings is that the bride and groom need not worry about the other person backing out. Why, you may ask?

Because all of these couples are already married.

One couple got married three years ago and didn’t want to have the big event until the bride finished getting her second degree. The second couple got married prior to the groom’s deployment overseas. The third couple just wanted to get married and figured they wanted the ceremony after they saved up enough money.

The one thing I must admit that I like about going to weddings for married couples is the reassurance that a wedding will likely take place. I’ve seen enough called-off engagements happen up to just three weeks before the wedding. So forgive me if skepticism sets in when I open the engraved invitation in my mailbox.

However, one of my acquaintances says having a bigger ceremony down the line is being selfish. To him, it’s just a waste of time considering the action has taken place already.

What do you think of couples who wait to have the ceremony after they have gotten married? When a couple has been married for awhile, do you believe it makes the event any less significant?