I've been a little under the weather this week with a basic head cold, which is no fun. But I was lucky that on my worst day, my boyfriend came over to my apartment, cooked dinner, watched some TV with me and tucked me into bed. What a sweetheart.
A few years back when I was dating another guy, I wasn't so nice.
My boyfriend at the time was sick, and he insisted that I stay with him the entire time. He wasn't feeling well one night, so I went out with my friends, only to have him complain that I wasn't taking good care of him. And since he complained about it so much, when I did do something nice, like bring him soup, it felt forced and not genuine, even if it was.
When I talked with friends at the time, I received different reactions, which basically could be divided into two sides: my single friends and my friends in relationships. The friends in relationships said things like, "Awww, you left him all by himself?" and my single friends said things like, "Why should you stay home when he's the sick one?" I never was sure if I was overreacting to his requests or reacting appropriately.
What do you consider proper etiquette when one person in a relationship is sick? And I'm not talking about being terminally ill or seriously sick. I'm talking about a cold or the flu. Should the healthy one always stay at home taking care of the sick one? What have you done in the past? Why do you think single people and non-single people view the situation differently?
Friday, October 26, 2007
In sickness and in health
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5 comments:
In a good relationship, both partners are aware of each other's need. Therefore, if one partner is sick, you check on them and see what they need. Once you've done that, I feel it's ok to take care of your social needs. In many cases, your partner will understand. If not, there's some great medicines that will cause drowsiness to sink in right when you're ready to head out the door. Just kidding.
Haha. You're too funny :)
My bofriend ended up getting sick our last night in Vegas. We were there with a lot of our friends and he told me to go ahead to a party we were all supposed to attend. I went to show my face, stayed for about an hour and a half and went back to bring him food/water/etc. Everyone was happy. He knew I cared. He also knew that it was Vegas and he didn't want me to sit in the room suffering with him the entire night.
Wow, hopefully you have grown up a little bit by now!....He probably complained because you were selfish and self-centered, and, if the situation was reversed, probably would have expected him to stay with you.
I always think it's important to help a friend or significant other when they are under the weather...it shows that you care!
Self centered or not, I have very little interest in taking care of someone and sitting by their side. Boyfriend, friend, mom, dad, whoever! I'll do my part to make sure they're going to be OK, then I'm going to move on. Why risk myself getting sick to sit there and pity someone? It doesn't mean I don't care!
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