Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Securing a first date

A lot of what we write about on this blog has to do with what happens after you acquire the all-important first date. Of course, none of that information is helpful if you can't even get to that point, a fact that many of you recently have pointed out.

Before you post a comment about how I don't understand the difficulty of getting a date past a certain age, hear me out. I understand that getting a date is a lot different for 20-year-old compared to a 40-year-old. I understand that not everyone is thin and looks like Jessica Alba or Matthew Fox. However, there are certain things people of all ages and body types can do to increase their chances of attracting the opposite sex.

The following tips are based on traits I find attractive in the opposite sex.

1. Be confident. And if you don't have confidence, fake it until you do. This piece of advice really can apply to anything in life, from getting a date to getting a job. People who appear confident and sure of themselves make others have confidence in them. Time and time again, I have heard guys say that confidence attracts them to women, and as a woman, I can tell you confidence attracts me to men.

2. Keep up your appearance. Work with what you've got. Fewer people are perfect than imperfect, so it's unreasonable to expect perfection. Simple things like being clean and well-kept go a long way. Think of all the makeovers you see on TV. I always think everyone ends up looking amazing after getting an updated haircut and clothes that fit.

3. Smile. OK, so I stole this from another blogger, but it's true! If you don't look friendly, no one is going to approach you. Think of it this way: Would you rather approach someone who is smiling at you or someone who is frowning? I'd go for the smile every time.

4. Share common interests. Join groups that include people who you would like to meet. For example, if you join a gardening club, you already have a topic of conversation (no worrying about what to say) and a love of flowers in common. To meet people, you have to go places besides work and home. This is one way to do so.

5. Enjoy the life you have. You're not going to meet someone overnight, so you might as well enjoy being single. Besides, everyone always says love comes when you least expect it.

What are some things people can do to attract the opposite sex and secure a first date? What attracts you to another person? What makes you ask a person out on a date?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

good teeth, a nice smile, good hair. not that hard to achieve. i'm not asking for brad pitt, but grooming is always nice. in fact, i prefer men who are not buff. my sister prefers men with a little chub going on. i agree wholeheartedly about confidence also. i hate having to constantly assure my boyfriends or friends of their attractiveness, intelligence, etc. it brings down the mood, and is quite annoying.

Anonymous said...

Very good points! I would just add one thing. Be happy with who you are, the way you are. Don't expect someone to come along and MAKE you happy! If you expect that, you will never get it. That is too much pressure to put on someone.