A study from Indiana University delivered earth-shattering information last week: When selecting mates, men go for looks while women tend to be more selective.
No duh, right? After getting over the article's explanation of how this all falls into Darwinism and its selection of the labels "choosy females" and "competitive males," I read on further where they said men say they want certain character and professional qualities in a mate, but if she's hot, he tends to forget about those.
Like the men, the women also didn't stick within the qualities they say they want in a guy, but they tended to be more discriminating. Why? Because they wanted a man who was going to stick around. Oddly enough, they never exactly said why the men choose women based on physical traits. I guess they just do.
One of the things that stuck out to me the most was that neither group, male or female, really stuck to what they stated their preferences were. Not that I will ever get this question answered, but I wonder if they wrote down what sounds good. You know the usual suspects in that line-up- ambitious, good-looking, rich, a good person.
Have you ever made a list or noted all of your preferences in a mate? When you date, do you find yourself going out with people with all those qualities or is it just based on attraction?
Monday, September 10, 2007
I prefer this but I'll take that
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3 comments:
As a guy, I can assure you that qualities in a woman do matter. Sure, some guys may only be interested in looks, but those guys also aren't interested in actual relationships. When looking for relationships we definitely look for qualities like personality, intelligence and sense of humor. But the fact is, looks do matter. If you aren't attracted to someone, you're not likely to pursue a relationship. Keep in mind though, different guys find different kinds of women attractive.
So the short answer is, yes looks matter, but there's a whole list of other things that come into play first.
I've made plenty of lists with my girlfriends about what I want in a man. There's the standard:
No criminal background, good credit, job, goals, belief in God, no kids (sorry), good personal hygine and grooming, owns a vehicle, if over the age of 22 has own place.
For some reason, I always over looked looks and dated guys who I weren't attracted to at first but then they grew on me and became more handsome.
You strive to get what you want on your "list" but sometimes something totally opposite creeps in and surprises the heck out of you... but no matter what I always try to stick to the standard. No matter how different all of my boyfriends were from skateboarder types to law school students, to artists, they all tended to be arrogant. Go figure.
I had a list of things I wanted from a man. I posted it on my wall just a a visual of what I wanted. One day my (now) ex boyfriend decided he wanted to read it. He was very pissed. He thought I had posted it after we started dating and was upset because he wasn't a lot of things on the list. I told him I chose him because of his great personailty even though he didn't meet everything on my list. -Maybe that's why we broke up.
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