Thursday, September 6, 2007

Breaking the contract

Sometimes, as adults, we find ourselves in relationships for the sole purpose of sex. These types of situations are given many names: the jump-off, booty call, sex buddy and other references which I'm sure you've heard at some point and time.

Either way, agreements are made that we both acknowledge the limited extent of the relationship. The expectation is to engage in sexual intercourse from time to time and that's it. No dinner. No morning after. No meeting the parents. No Valentine's Day presents. Just sex after a well-timed phone call or text.

These types of situations can go on for years without a single bump in the road. However, many times, it never gets that far because someone begins to develop romantic feelings for the other, hence, the breaking of the contract.

Now, one could acknowledge their feelings, which would acknowledge the contract being broken. This has, on occasion, led to rejection and dismissal by the other person. Or the other person could acknowledge that they feel the same way leading to more contemplation.

Another option could be not acknowledging those feelings. People who I've seen try this method usually put themselves through an agony filled with hypotheticals.

Is it possible to be in a purely sexual relationship without ever developing feelings for the other person? Can a successful romantic relationship develop from a purely sexual relationship?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well is it even possible to have sex with someone for whom you don't have any feelings of a romantic kind at all?
To start with.
I think there's always some feelings.

Anonymous said...

it is totally possible.

Anonymous said...

i have a 14 year old daughter and i hope she NEVER has sex with a man that she has no feelings for. i did when i was in my 20s and all i remember is feeling empty inside about it later. besides, the best sex is with your spouse because that commitment allows you to put it all out there and not hold anything back....

Anonymous said...

I had a sexual relationship with my friend for years. No one "caught" feelings. Soon we started dating other people and we stopped having sex but we're still friends. It's rare but it could happen.